Wednesday, 10 June 2009

  • FUCK MY JOB!

    I wake up early to go to a job I hate.
    I wake up early so I can sit in traffic.
    I wake up early and want to die.

    The morning sun taunts me.
    A blinding reminder of the fun I cannot have.

    A day of mind-numbing monotony
    for a paycheck I'd rather not have.

    An eleven hour day that drains me to the bone.

    Too tired to think when I get home.

    I dream of the books I could be reading,
    the songs I could be writing,
    the friends I could be enjoying.

    But when I get home all I can do is sleep.

    Work, eat, shit, repeat.

    Maybe a bullet will shatter this waking dream.

    Get the fuck out of my way, I just want to go home.

Monday, 20 April 2009

  • comcast_logo__2_ Back in October 2008 Comcast implemented a controversial amendment to their terms of service for high-speed internet customers by applying a 250gb monthly bandwidth cap which is punishable by a 12 month termination of service.

    As this unlucky customer documents, Comcast has been both ambiguous and underhanded in applying the cap.

    First, Comcast seems to have been purposely vague when explaining the cap by conveniently not mentioning the fact that the cap is for both UPLOADS AND DOWNLOADS. That means the cap applies to all of the information you both send and receive.

    The way Comcast explained it to me I assumed the cap applied to downloads only. And I know I am not the only one who falsely made that assumption.

    Secondly, Comcast's claim that "less than 1% (currently it’s about one tenth of 1%) of Comcast customers today use an excessive amount of data" seems to be their only justification for the cap. Comcast describes excessive use as using so much data that it negatively effects other customers.

    Is Comcast then making the claim that "one tenth of1%" of their customers are using so much bandwidth that it is negatively affecting the other 99.99% of their other customers?

    Talk about excessive. Applying a 250gb up and downstream cap is like using a bazooka to protect your children from schoolyard bullies. Sure it gets the job done but the potential for unnecessary and avoidable collateral damage is all but inevitable.

    Either these people are using a DISGUSTING amount of bandwidth or Comcast has seriously underestimated and, subsequently, fraudulently advertised the power of their products.

    Now I am going to stop beating around the bush. One of the major reasons why Comcast has implemented this cap is to prevent people from file sharing via P2P networks and Bit Torrent clients. I am not sure if they are caving into pressure from the RIAA, but it sure seems likely to me.

    Regardless, Comcast should not limit my PAID access to the internet in any capacity. They should have no interest nor bearing on how I use my internet connection.

    Do we hold Smith & Wesson accountable for all the murders committed with their weapons?

    As it stands right now, Comcast has a seeming monopoly on high-speed internet connections in my area. I haven't done research on it, but I assume it is the same in other parts of the country as well. I have no other bandwidth comparable, cap-free alternatives right now. So, I am stuck with these crooks.

    As soon as WOW! has internet available in my zip code, you can rest assured I will be dropping Comcast faster than P. Diddy's relevancy.

    Something about this whole situation feels very unconstitutional to me.

    Oh, and here is some further reading in case you're interested.

    Remember, the internet is an unbelievably powerful tool for expression and the pursuit of freedom. Don't let money-hungry companies like Comcast potentially stand in your way.

    Even if you don't use a ludicrously large amount of upload/download streaming, like 250gb a month, just know that a lot of useful, legal technologies are moving/already exist on a predominantly digital format, like NetFlix, iTunes, eMusic, Hulu, PlayStation Network, Xbox Live and so on.

    Make a stink now before Comcast really jacks up the price and continues to narrow your monthly allotment of internet.

Sunday, 25 January 2009

  • From Wikipedia: In the October 1999 issue of the Boston Review, Yates was quoted on his central theme: "If my work has a theme, I suspect it is a simple one: that most human beings are inescapably alone, and therein lies their tragedy."

    I just saw Revolutionary Road, a movie based on a novel of the same name written by Richard Yates. In short, I thought it to be an amazing film. I am still chewing on it.

    Yates' quote also has my mind stewing. I do believe that humans are inextricably alone; we are tied down by our own web of social mores, yet inside we yearn to cut ourselves free from those needless entanglements. I think a lot of us tend to keep our inclinations toward achievable personal freedom a secret. We hide our true selves, our deepest desires and regrets, from anyone who might cast a crooked eyebrow upon us.

    At the same time, however, I do not see being alone wholly as a tragedy. If you love yourself, who you are, then being alone might not be all that bad. It would just simply be lonely. At the very least you could be true to yourself, free from the desire to hinge your dreams upon the fickle fancies of another person. Though, loneliness too has its costs. All great people stand upon the shoulders of giants, and no man is an island.

    Both loneliness and gregariousness can have their respective detriments, but it is up to the strong-willed person to find that middle ground, to find that moderate road where one can blend the blessings of both into a life worth living.

    I hope to do that one day: to grow old and stay true to myself.

Friday, 26 December 2008

  • According to this CNN story/poll, 75% of people are glad Bush is gone.

    I stumbled upon this little nugget while reading: "82 percent say he did not unite the country; 17 percent say he did."

    I dunno, sounds like he did a B- job of uniting the country. Against himself...

    Currently
    Muscle
    By The Adventures of Jet
    Emily Mazurinsky
    see related

Saturday, 20 December 2008

  • It's final.

    I've decided I am moving to California. I don't know how, I don't know when. But this is my last full year in Chicagoland for a while.


    I will be sorting out the details over the next month or so. But this chapter of my life is closing and a new story will begin shortly.


    I am not asking for anyone's opinion or permission, just your support.


    I love you all more than I've ever let on and more than you will ever know. I just have to do this for myself. I have to see what else is out there.


    I can't argue with nor squelch this wanderlust of mine. So I must abate it simply through action.


    Whether I succeed or fail is merely circumstantial. I simply must do.

Friday, 19 December 2008

  • I don't particularly care for Sundays.

    This past week and all of its memories are gone. What was once this week is now last week.

    Everything I did is now simply a memory subject to the emotional trappings of nostalgia. The last thing I need is more ammunition for pensive thoughts loaded with poignancy.

    Right now, no matter what I am doing, my actions begin to feel like a memory even before the moment passes.

    It's Thursday.

    I've shed tears twice today.

    Today feels like Sunday.

    Currently
    Sorry About Tomorrow
    By Hot Rod Circuit
    Knees
    see related

Thursday, 18 December 2008

  • ugh, so much to think about

    i don't think i want to live here anymore. my brother, my best friend is moving away. i can no longer tolerate Chicago winters and, like i've previously ranted about, i don't want to feel so comfortable anymore.

    i want something new. More specifically, i want something warmer.

    i am actively going to be pursuing jobs out west. as much as i might proclaim to be a region rat i don't truly feel connected to this area like i once did.

    my mind is wandering and i want my body to follow.

    i am definitely at a cross roads. i have a lot on my mind and the next couple of months are going to be exceptionally introspective.

    what do i really want out of life?

    i think it would be a healthy combination of love and consistent sunshine.
    Currently
    Knowing Is Half The Hassle
    see related

Sunday, 23 November 2008

  • uncomfortably comfortable

    simply put, i've become too comfortable. ironically, it is unnerving to me.

    i no longer feel the need to succeed. success, of course, meaning striving to be myself over all else.

    instead i am simply just being. i am only existing.

    i need to feel scared and uncomfortable. i need something to rattle my cage and knock me on my ass.

    i can't stand this anymore. i spend all of my free time roaming a virtual world (via Fallout 3) looking for the unknown and seeking danger.

    when i was away at school i felt on edge and nervous most of the time. having spent a year and a half away from that environment, i now realize that those factors brought me perilously close to being the person i actually want to be.

    i am craving instability and uncertainty.

    Currently
    Blink 182
    By blink-182, Blink 182
    always
    see related

Monday, 10 November 2008

Saturday, 08 November 2008

  • time for a bemused musing

    Sometimes I come across a quote which answers a question I didn't realize I was asking. The quote jumps off the screen and says "Analyze me! Think about what I am saying and apply me to you." I love those moments.

    After reading this, I was asking these...

    Why do I procrastinate and hammer out tunes on my bass and play video games for 8-hour stretches only to look at the clock and want to play more?

    Why do I do these things when I "should" be working on my writing, or paying bills, or reading, or learning new skills?

    Specifically, it was mc chris' speculation that got my gray matter swirling.

    “I don’t think it’s about nerds,” he said, after reflection. “It’s about grown men who are in this new phase of their life, their mid-20s or late 20s, postcollege. They just want to think about the kid stuff. Because it’s easier. It’s a simpler time.”

    Currently Listening
    Return of the Rentals
    By The Rentals
    see related

ObeyTheFist

  • Visit ObeyTheFist's Xanga Site
    • Name: Brandon
    • Country: United States
    • State: Indiana
    • Birthday: 6/30/1981
    • Gender: Male
    • Member Since: 2/21/2002
  • These dreams are what I live for, not slaving to retire. SEIZE THE DAY!!!

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